tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7016199476744963516.post8767849605590940702..comments2015-03-19T20:23:19.666-04:00Comments on The Freckled Canvas: It Is Not The EndElliehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00854931332021118071noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7016199476744963516.post-77392402574089584982014-01-07T23:45:18.022-05:002014-01-07T23:45:18.022-05:00Having a desire to serve is the first step in bein...Having a desire to serve is the first step in being an incredible missionary. So that's incredible as is. I understand why you're feeling this way though. You want to change other's lives just like how yours was changed by your dad converting and being sealed in the temple. But just remember- "If He brings you to it, He'll bring you through it." Good luck with everything your going through Ellie. I know everyone has tried to share advice, sympathy, and all sorts of different emotions to try and comfort you. But the truth is that no one knows what you're going through. No one knows exactly how hard THIS is for YOU and no one can fully understand your exact emotions. Nobody can. Except our loving Savior. I came across this quote by one of the former counselors in the General Relief Society Presidency (Sister Chieko N Okazaki) : "We know that Jesus experienced the totality of mortal existence in Gethsemane. It's our faith that he experienced everything-- absolutely everything. Sometimes we don't think through the implications of that belief. We talk in great generalities about the sins of all humankind, about the suffering of the entire human family. But we don't experience pain in generalities. We experience it individually. That means he knows what it felt like when your mother died of cancer- how it was for your mother, how it still is for you. He knows what it felt like to lose the student body election. He knows that moment when the brakes locked and the car started to skid. He experienced the slave ship sailing from Ghana toward Virginia. He experienced the gas chambers at Dachau. He experienced napalm in Vietnam. He knows about drug addiction and alcoholism. Let me go further. There is nothing you have experienced as a woman that he does not know and recognize. On a profound level, he understands both the physical pain of giving birth and the immense joy. His last recorded words to his disciples were, "And, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world." (Matthew 28:20) He understands your mother-pain when your five-year-old leaves for kindergarten, when a bully picks on your fifth-grader, when your daughter calls to say that the new baby has Down's Syndrome. [And I add in this for you: He understands when you have such a strong desire to serve Him, even if things don't work out for you to have that oppurtunity. He knows how much it crushed your heart.] He knows your mother-rage when a trusted babysitter sexually abuses your two-year-old, when someone gives your thirteen-year-old drugs, when someone seduces your seventeen-year-old. He knows the pain you live with when you come home to a quiet apartment where the only visitors are children, when you hear that your former husband and his new wife were sealed in the temple last week, when your fiftieth wedding anniversary rolls around and your husband has been dead for two years. He knows all that. He's been there. He's been lower than all that. He's not waiting for us to be perfect. Perfect people don't need a Savior. He came to save his people in their imperfections. He is the Lord of the living, and the living make mistakes. He's not embarrassed by us, angry at us, or shocked. He wants us in our brokenness, in our unhappiness, in our guilt and our grief."<br />Good luck as you continue your journey through life and whatever you plans may be now! :)<br /><br />kinsie.peterson@myldsmail.netKinsie Petersonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13802744511171531689noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7016199476744963516.post-20731210810389695902014-01-04T11:25:43.777-05:002014-01-04T11:25:43.777-05:00Hugs!! and Love!! Heavenly Father has a mission f...Hugs!! and Love!! Heavenly Father has a mission for you...I have learned that our plans for life are not his plans for our life...Our faith is tested around every bend. You are an awesome, amazing Daughter of God.<br />Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11142610533400582643noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7016199476744963516.post-7430070817711168892014-01-04T08:38:24.863-05:002014-01-04T08:38:24.863-05:00I'm so sorry you didn't get the answer you...I'm so sorry you didn't get the answer you wanted but I agree with Cindy, you are AMAZING!!! You are one of those people who inspire the rest of us to do better at our callings. Monicahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05812531635799455693noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7016199476744963516.post-68728701716175069592014-01-04T00:05:14.165-05:002014-01-04T00:05:14.165-05:00You serve in your callings like a boss.lol Isaac a...You serve in your callings like a boss.lol Isaac and I were just talking about how amazing you are today. I think you are already on the Lord's errand.Cindy Howardhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11134631240054745105noreply@blogger.com